God loves me. I know because my skirt fell off in the middle of the parking lot at night, and not while I was onstage singing.
*on the drive home*
(I'm parked outside Carl's jr waiting for my congratulatory fried zuchini, watching a man stumble across the parking lot, sway on the curb, and hobble towards my car.) That guy looks a little drunk. I think I'll roll my windows up.
*a second later*
(watching as he adusts his pantleg over his huge, gargantuan leg-cast) I'm a complete jerk.
*This morning* I wonder if leprosy is related to chicken pox. I can't imagine anything more unsightly and disgusting.
My poor, poor babies. What would they think of me if they knew I made them suffer like this on purpose?
*at about 12:30 pm*
(standing in line at the city administration building)
Look at all those fairy princesses. Too bad they aren't old enough to vote yet.
Wow. I didn't know false eyelashes could have rhinestones.
That guy's counting the line, saying maybe McCain will win Utah before November 2. I wonder what he'd think if he knew I'm voting for the other guy?
I wonder how many of these people are voting for the other guy? It can't be just me, can it?
*at 3:24 pm*
is it a sign of immaturity if I adore any candy that has a radioactive grape flavor?
My kids will look back on today with fondness, even though right now they probably can't imagine a worse form of hell: unbearable itching and having to stay home from trick-or-treating.
Luckily, only the 6 year old really knows what she'd be missing. And she's well, so she can go. Thank goodness.
I've got to get some taffy flavored cookies before everyone else panicks and there's a run on the grocery stores.