I think our church is full of wonderful men and women who are charitable and considerate. I don't think that people leave certain minority groups out in the cold on purpose; if it ever happens, it is simply because of a lack of perspective. A white, male, land-owning priesthood leader has likely not been there, and so likely misses things every once in a while.
I'm not talking about race here. Or even gender, necessarily (though this is an element).
I'm talking about young motherhood!! That's right. Here are a few examples that get my dander up a little on sundays:
1) The sacrament is not brought to the foyer in my ward. Because of the time change, my son's usual nursing time falls right smack dab in the middle of the sacrament. I have gone breadless and waterless for 2 weeks now.
--now I know this is something I can work on and solve myself. But I feel just a little left out... and I don't understand why they don't bring the sacrament out to the foyer where the young mothers (perhaps chasing an unruly toddler, or coming out of the nursing mother's room for a moment)can partake.
2) For the last several sundays, nobody has turned on the heat that heats up the nursing mother's room. I am soooo grateful my church has nursing mother's rooms... one quite roomy and one cozy, nestled in the doorway of the bathroom. I've heard of places where this has been omitted from the building design, leaving mothers to the indiginty of nursing in toilet stalls. Whenever I have to do this, I feel like nursing must be something dirty, that I have to do it on the toilet. Anyway, slight venty side note.
As I was saying, the nursing mother's room has been ice-cold for all the hours of church for the last two sundays, and I can't find the switch to turn the heat on! It's not in the nursing mother's room. Skywalker says it must be in one of the rooms next to it (either the Mens' bathroom or a classroom).
3) Sunday school is apparently not for young mothers who have kids in that difficult gap-age between walking and nursery. I have gathered from the looks directed at me when I have tried to attend with him (and he's really not that loud... little cooing noises, an occasional giggle) that babies are not welcome in Sunday school. Last sunday I spent the second hour in the foyer with all the other moms who have kids that age. I feel like, as a young mother, I'm being told that I don't belong in the ward, or in a classroom learning gospel doctrine. I should be chasing my toddler around the foyer instead.
You know, I can do that much more easily at home.
4) Nursing in sacrament meeting. I have tried it a few times (under a blanket, of course) but have gotten some wierd looks. Apparently, as a young mother, I'm not supposed to be in the chapel when I nurse. For some reason, nursing is considered an indecent enough activity that it is relegated to the bathroom stall or a special room so that nobody has to look at me.
the problem is, when I go to said special room, half the time there are moms in there chatting (and that presents another dilemma... should I be social and chat and be a good ward member that way, or should I be quiet and try to listen and be spiritually fed. Anyway) and so I don't get to hear much.
It's a vent, people. Sorry. Anyway, hopefully the purpose of this blog post will be to help people see that there is a problem. Us young mothers get little sleep, we're nutritionally challenged because we've got cute little babies suckin' it all out of us, we have little time to ourselves throughout the week, and we really don't get enough time with our husbands, either. Please, please don't take spiritual nourishment away from us, too.
Ideas? Thoughts, anyone?
*you can tell this has not been one of my best Sundays.*
Labels: sometimes it's blue, the plight of young motherhood