OK... this is getting bizarre.

http://fametastic.co.uk/archive/20070912/7600/paris-hilton-looking-to-adopt-mini-mes/

Paris Hilton is reportedly considering adopting children to start her family as per her desired schedule.

Paris said recently that she hopes to start a family next year but doesn’t have a potential father in mind just yet.

A source has now told Closer magazine: “Paris has been saying, ‘You don’t need a husband to have babies.’ There are babies in orphanages around the world, and she’s hoping to find four girls with blonde hair and pretty eyes to whom to give the Hilton name.”

In the same way her mum Kathy Hilton moulded her for fame, Paris will do the same with her offspring: “She’s been telling people, ‘I want a brood of little mini versions of me.’ I’ll raise them to be the most famous women in the world.”"

And just as she designed a line of dog coats for her collection of pets: “She’ll design a line of baby clothes. She sees her kids modelling from a young age.”

Ha ha-- fun trick

Soooo, Janell did this fun thing on her blog and I'm copying her. I type my first name followed by the word "needs" all together in quotes and see what the search engine comes up with. After paging through several pages of other blogs with women who share my name that have done this, I randomly chose page 17 of the search results because 17 is my lucky number. And here the list is, in all its glory (with my name replaced by my usual alias, of course):


1)The physiological tests proved beyond doubt that Nosurfgirl "needs" her carnitine. (Tour de France, here I come!)

2)Nosurfgirl needs to become self-dependent. We know what is going to happen when she mixes it up with Stillson. (Whoo hoo! Skywalker, are you reading this?)

3)Nosurfgirl needs to lighten up and dig deeper musically to keep me as a fan. (Hmm. Well I haven't blogged any social responsibility moments lately, does that count for something?)

4)Nosurfgirl needs to learn to deal with the small remnants of memories she has of another life. (I think I was Cleopatra. Or maybe Susan B Anthony.)

5)I think Nosurfgirl needs your prayers. (She does.)

6)Nosurfgirl) needs surgery in the morning (neutering) (AAAAck. There's something really wrong here, then.)

7)"Nosurfgirl needs to know about everything, and then has to know why everything is that way -- then she usually wants to change it," (Hmmm. Ok, well. Maybe.)

8)For now, Nosurfgirl's needs should be your focus. (That's right.)

9)Nosurfgirl needs your help to get elected to the Senate. (Vote for me in 2008.)

10) Nosurfgirl needs a belt because the dress is just hanging on her, without form. (It must be quite the tent, then... this basketball is not easily disguisable.)

You've got to be kidding

Holy Crap.

I seriously hope that this isn't true. Seriously. I'm not going to talk about this because it makes me too angry to be rational, so instead I have one word for you, Paris:

Tinkerbell.

Oh, and by the way, you can't put a rhinestone collar on a kid.

Cute Pic

Gotta love labor day. Here is Skywalker and Jaws enjoying a swingset moment, with Loli running rampant in the background.

Good Newses II

So, we found out that this next baby is a boy. Due January 18th. He's measuring big for his age, which is very cool. We're excited to have a boy in our girl family! Hooray!! So, we'll have three girls and two boys when this adoption process is over.

And...

I got an email today from Covenant, they asked for an electronic submission of my manuscript. They told me before that they had tabled it, so I moved on. But this request is a very, very good sign. Hooray!!

Onion article-- Rove leaves the white house

A little ascerbic, but definitely hilarious.

not all olives are equal

I have always loved black olives. My dad fed them to me as a baby. I would eat them like candy as a child. For Christmas one year, I requested a can of olives and found one in my stocking. I ate the entire thing by the end of the day.

I still love olives. I wait for sales, I buy in bulk-- olives and avocadoes (my husband's fetish) are our food budget luxuries.

But not every olive is alike for taste and quality. Here are some olive pointers:

Smaller olives are more delicious, most of the time. Don't buy the jumbo or large pitted, buy medium pitted. True, they won't fit on your fingers as well, but, well, we have to make some compromises if we want a truly delicious olive experience.

Be careful about generic brands. While some can produce a crisp, mildly salty, delicious olive, some are more inclined to the slightly winey, mushier type. If that's your preference, all the power in the world to you. As an olive connoseur, though, I have to say that I think I know what I'm talking about.

When you want to use only a few olives out of the can and save the rest, make sure you leave enough of that olive juice in the can to cover the remaining olives. Otherwise they get all rubbery and develop a distinctly winey aftertaste.

Unless you eat them on pizza or in mexican food, olives are much more delicious whole. (Olives in mexican food, you say? Oh, you need to try it.)

If any of you have bought yourself a can of olives that you are unsure of and would like advice, I am happy to inform you that my services as an olive tester are available. I'd give you my post office box, but then you would know where I live. So instead, I suggest that you post a picture of the olive in question and I will do my best to judge it on a purely visual basis.