the Lump

Lolipopaholic has a little friend-- let's call her Tutuchild. Loli and Tutu play together a couple of times a week. They LOVE each other. It's been funny to see their attachment develop-- first it was two-year-old attachment, where they sort of played alongside each other and got along as long as they didn't get in each others' way. Then they learned to play together-- fantastical imagined games, loud rowdy screaming fun, bossing each other until they end up crying and requiring reconciliation by whatever parental figure is present.

Lately, however, it's taken another turn-- attachment. For the past few months, Loli looks despondent whenever it's time for Tutu to go, and Tutu will burst into tears and give the offending parent(me)covert evil glances as I hustle loli out the door.

Just this last week, they've started doing things in BETWEEN their visits for each other. Loli writes notes for Tutu and draws pictures for her, talks about her all the time. She's been making 'emails' (a piece of paper with a picture and letters scribbled on it, folded in half and stickered to death) for Tutu and giving them to her when they visit.

In return, Tutu is peppering us with random cards, obviously snatched from a stockpile somewhere-- cards with a picture of a baby being blessed, cards with flowers and birds, etc. Last week, Tutu gave Loli a "present"-- a blue gift bag with some alphabet-fridge letters, a few cards, and this random thing that looks like stale bread dough with a twisty tie around it.

In return, Loli gave Tutu (the same) gift bag with her little plastic ring (which she adores, so it's kind of touching) and some pictures and letters.

The stuff is lying around on her desk. I go through the pile of stuff on Loli's desk every few days and sort through the thirty or so pictures she has drawn/painted/stamped, saving out the best and tossing the rest. (I know, it sounds cruel... but I can't save three hundred pictures a month!) Anyway, I also tossed the bread dough piece in the trash.

Three hours later-- Loli, giving me a hurt look, takes the bread dough from the trash. "Mom, you can't throw this away!"

I turn to her. "Loli, why do you want that? What is it, anyway?"

Long pause. "It's the lumpy thing that Tutu gave me!"

So now it sits safely on her desk, enshrined along with her bear-shaped fingerpainting sponge (fingerpaints long dried up), her maple leaf from our walk last Saturday, and her collection of topless markers. (One of these days, I'm going to arrest them all for indecent exposure and put them Where They Belong, ala trashe canne. But I'll have to do it when Loli's not looking).

In a way, I wish that I could be as undemanding as a 4 year old-- accepting a lump as token of affection.

But then, a diamond ring is much more fun than bread dough. So maybe I'll keep my expectations high.

Lol.