Grouchy Mom

So this morning so far I have:

1) Dragged myself out of bed to find a grand-mal mess all over the floor, after hearing squeals about Squirt getting down the paints and listening to various ominous thuds and crashes.
2) sent Bella up to time-out for insufferable, continuous tattling.
3) nagged the kids for approximately 30 full minutes in a not-always-the-nicest-I-could-be tone to clean up all the paints, paper, toys, and also all their hundreds of little tiny pieces of paper scattered across the floor after making snowflakes.
4) confiscated the scissors and put them on the top shelf and announced, "no scissors for a while."
5) threw away a perfectly good glue stick because the cap was nowhere in sight and nobody seemed to be motivated to find it, then announced, "no more glue for a while."
6) got frustrated at MayMay for crying because I told her we're not going to work in one of her school books today, after she already cried this morning a) because I wasn't giving out oatmeal seconds (I gave them all heaping bowls to begin with and used up the pot) b) having to wait to get oatmeal until the living room was cleaned up and c) I asked Squirt instead of her to "help" me vacuum by turning on the button for me.
7) Mentally cussed out the printer for not listening to my computer, thus not printing off the two worksheets for Bella.
8) Mentally cussed out Skywalker because he's not here to fix my printer problem. (mormon cussing only)
9) Got frustrated at Jaws not listening to me while I explained, half-a-dozen times, how to do her worksheet (she's only 3... sigh.)
10) Got frustrated at Bella because we've done 10, 11, and 12 for five days running and she still seems to really not recognize any of those numbers... her first guess when I held up 10 -- "thirteen??" Sigh. Made her sit and look at them for five minutes instead of drawing her snowman which was what she really wanted to do instead of flash cards.
11) Got mad at Loli because she had taken the snowflakes she "cleaned up" and heaped them on the piano. Asked her to throw them away or put them away, watched as she promptly gathered them up and dumped them on the computer desk. Informed her that she's just as bad as any of the other kids sometimes when it comes to cleaning and she needs to throw away all her snowflakes.
12) Gave a somewhat sharp lecture about cleaning and how, if you clean up as you go, you'll only have little messes... if you don't put things away, you'll have big messes.
13) Turned on PBS kids, sat my toddlers in front of it, and retreated to my room to sulk.

Which is where I am now.

Maybe if I relax and read a chapter of Harry Potter, I can get up and try again.