Oct 1, 2011

Things We Say: Chameleons

NSG: you need to stop opening all those windows. We have too many flies in this house!

Skywalker: It gets too hot to leave them shut. What we really need are a lot of flyswatters.

NSG: (thinking of a recent conversation about how it was time to get a cat or dog, because there might be a mouse living in one of the walls) Or just a bunch of spiders.

Skywalker: (makes terrible face, but doesn't look up from mindless castle game he's playing)

NSG: No, you're right. Maybe more like... an iguana.

Skywalker: An Iguana?

NSG: They eat flies. They have these really long tongues that whip out and--

Skywalker: Are you sure you don't mean chameleons?

NSG: The ones with those funny eyes.

Skywalker: Chameleons.

NSG: Yeah, that's even more perfect. Because then you wouldn't even know there were lizards in your house, because they'd blend into everything. We could have a chameleon for the upstairs, and one for the downstairs. And one in our bathroom and one in the downstairs bathroom. I hate it when there are flies in the bathroom.

Skywalker: (finaly looking up from Ipod) Hmm.

NSG: And if a guest came over, they might be sitting on the toilet and then they'd look over and see that it wasn't JUST a counter, like they thought. It's a counter with a chameleon on it. Or they might just be really surprised if suddenly this lizard jumps out or whips out its long tongue to catch a fly.

Skywalker: we could also get a bunch of venus flytraps.

NSG: Yeah. Because homeschooling and vegetarianism just aren't wierd enough anymore.

4 comments:

Anthony D said...

Or you could put this thing in the windows called a screen then you can leave the windows open all you want.

Unknown said...

Anthony...you're right. The beginning of this was kind of a half-finished thought. Jeff knew I meant those times he opens up all the windows AND the doors to get a cool breeze blowing through the house, though I only said windows :p and didn't bothet to correct me because it would have taken too much attention from that bleeping castle game.as kind of a half-finished thought. Jeff knew I meant those times he opens up all the windows AND the doors to get a cool breeze blowing through the house, though I only said windows :p and didn't bothet to correct me because it would have taken too much attention from that bleeping castle game.

Unknown said...

That comment somehow multiplied itself.

David L said...

No cats... Seriously. I know there are cat lovers out there (God bless you), but no cats....

Serious allergies.

And what castle game is this? If Jeff likes it, I'm pretty sure I'd be in.